Monday, April 30, 2012

When you dream, dream big

I've been thinking alot lately. Actually I think allll the time.. literally all the time. I'm really good at giving advice to others.. much better at teaching them the basic principles of the gospel. I can teach someone about Faith.. and how they should have faith in God and trust him.. believe that He is and that He WILL fulfill his promises.. For myself though.. not so much. Why is t that I can know that these blessings God has are for the people I teach, yet struggle believing it for myself? hah It's a hard task. It's not that I don't think God loves or cares for me.. it's that I just haven't had the strongest Faith in believing all the promises He gave to me.. will actually happen.. if I do my best. I sell myself short.. all the time.. for all you out there that sell yourself short... STOP It. thanks.
A mission teaches you.. if you let it.. how to "hold fast" to God.  How to change. How to become better than you were before. I realize that I truely have changed.. I now have a log of all the things I struggle with (don't worry, not massive sins, just things I want to change) There are 5 main things that I can do better.. Every day I check off whether or not that particular problem happened that day. . I literally log my progress. It's a huge eye opener.. I believe doing this has helped me be more prepared each Sunday to take the sacrament.. It helps me feel less guilt.. It helps me repent fast.. It's pretty cool. haha I recommend it.

I needed a blessing this week. I hadn't slept at all for days.. it was just a hard week. Well I'm prideful and basically refuse to get a blessing until I'm about to break.. (maybe I should put this on my log) anyhow.. I gave in and called and asked the stake President.. who just lives down the road from us.. He sat down with me and we chatted for a bit. Let me just tell you this man is Rad. yep. I said it. He is so full of the Spirit it radiates off him. We talked about my life, my mission, and what I'll do after. He opened my eyes to so many things. When he gave me a blessing it was seriously like a conduit to heaven opened up.. not even joking. It strengthened my testimony in the power of the Preisthood. it truely is restored to the Earth.. the same exact Preisthood when Christ was here. I felt it. I talked to this man for 15 minutes.. and some of the things the blessing said were direct quotes from my patriarchal blessing.. It was amazing.. there is no way it wasn't a strait message of God. Seriously a miracle..
   Which brings me to Miracles.. Miracles to not produce conversions. Take Nephi in 1NE17.. He's telling his brothers.. hey.. Moses lead the children of Israel out of bondage.. they were fed manna day,to day (except Sunday cause saturday they had to gather two days worth.. they complained about that) Basically they witnessed many miracles.. I mean Moses parted the Red freaking Sea!!! And the Children of Israel complained! They thought it might have been better if they remained slaves.. then Laman and Lemuel.. they saw an angel.. they heard God's voice from time to time.. but did it convert them? Nope. Fact is that if you are diligent in keeping the commandments and trying your best.. you will witness little miracles all the time.. but if you just saw miracles.. it would mean nothing.

   This week we started teaching a new family... the mom is a member, the dad is excommunicated and seriously poisons his kids minds with anti materials.. it's so sad. He gets them every other week.. The kids mom wants us to come and teach them, so she can have some reinforment for the gospel in the home. I love these kids. They are struggling like crazy.. but they remind me of me when I was young. It's a priveledge to see God working in my life, since I was young.. to meet other people struggling,. Anyway as we were teaching the kids.. about "Faith" haha One of the kids said "Sister Davidson, you smile ALOT, why are you always smiling".. ahah I said "We'll its' because I'm super happy, do you want me to frown"? haha there's a lot of good things coming around in this area.. Really

I love the Lord. there have been so many times where I have felt like Alma..
I love these scriptures.. I am going to place a few additions in here that make it personal to me.

 17 And it came to pass that as I was thus aracked with torment, while I was bharrowed up by the cmemory of my many sins.. (afflictions, pain, broken heart) behold, I dremembered also to have heard my father prophesy unto the people concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world.
 18 Now, as my mind caught hold upon this thought, I cried within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, ahave mercy on me, who am bin the cgall of bitterness, and am encircled about by the everlasting dchains of edeath.
 19 And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my apains bno more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins( afflictions, tempations, losses) no more.
 20 And oh, what ajoy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!
Some advice for myself.. and everyone else. when you dream of your future dream big. Dream as if God would grant you your every righteous desire.. because HE WILL!!!
  Love you..
Sister Davidson

Monday, April 23, 2012

Can this last forever?

This week was good. Like really good. I feel like I'm finally understanding.. just exactly how to be a missionary. It's so much work.. so much.. but it's worth it. God knows exactly why He puts people in a certain place, at a certain time. I truely believe that 100 percent. I've been doing alot of organization in this area.. there was no map for us to go by (we don't have gps mapped in our brains, sorry. Oh and we're not Elders who's dad's actually buy them gps's) So I've spent a bunch of time oraganizing the area into smaller area's that we can walk to and plan our days around. It's funny the random skills you pick up as a missionary.. before the mish I was literally directionally challenged.ha .. We found 5 new investigators this week! WOOP!
    The first family is the Michiels. Sister Michiels has a pair of triplets, and a set of twins.. Yep.. crazy. One of the kids (davis) has autism.. another one of the girls has slight autism.. and one has alot of problems and is basically bedridden.. When I saw them on the ward list I realized there was one mom with 5 kids.. no dad listed.. So I figured we should see how she is.  Can anyone guess that this mother needs help? She is actually going through a terrible divorce and hasn't made it to church in basically years. We got to know her a bit.. and then found out none of her kids are baptized.. and they are all old enough! So we started teaching them! We've taught them twice this week and I called a couple from the ward who picked them up for church! (Since the mom can't come because of Pheobe, the bed-ridden child)
     I cannot express how much joy fills my heart as I teach these children. Children understand things in a way adults don't. . and you know what they are super smart! It's impossible to explain the love I felt as we taught the children to sing "I am a child of God". . I'll never be able to express the joy as we taught them how to pray to thier Heavenly Father.. we all knelt down and waited as each child slowly said thier own prayer. My favorite was Davis's prayer (the one with autism) He said ..
"Dear Heavenly Father, My favorite Spider is the black widow.. but you probably already know that. I like them because of thier bright red spot.. and because they are the most poisonous. Thanks for the missionaries coming over, and please help us to have a great day. In the name of Jesus Christ Amen." ha
  My heart seriously almost burst when the kids came to church and there was Irelyn (all pretty in her red dress and pink tennis shoes) holding her Book of Mormon.. she ran up to me and said "Sister Davidson! You promised I could sit by you"!
   Geez. I don't want this to ever end. I feel like when I say I love the Book of Mormon, the Restored church, and Jesus Christ. it sounds cliche. But it's not. This gospel is for real. It's the only way to be content. . completely content with whatever God lets us go through. How patient He is with us. How much He truely loves us. I can feel His love all the time for the people around me. I can feel His love everyday. My life was good before my mission. But it's WAY better now. Good thing I came right?
    So Sam and Tiffany (the ex communicated couple) invited us to go fishing with them and the kids tonight! So excited right now. haha pray it goes well!
Love ya'll.
Sister Davidson

Monday, April 16, 2012

Aloha

A mission is like a long run.. you start out thinking wowza this is going to take forever.. I'm tired.. How am I ever going to complete this.. then you get your first wind.. your just strolling along, feeling great.. for a while your like "yeah, I got this"! Then as the next mile approaches your like.. dang, my legs ache.. why can't this be over (all the while saying.. I can't stop now I've come too far!) Finally your in that final stretch.. your sprinting to the finish.. your almost floating as you come closer to home.
  That's how I feel right now. The realization that I have 2 tranfers left seriously sinks my heart.. but I am sprinting to the finish. I'm giving it my best.. and it's going by tooo fast. I never want to come home. I just want to be the Lord's sevant forever. I know that maybe whoever is reading this thinks.. wow she's being dramatic.. she's got three whole months.. haha maybe you just don't understand. I spent the bulk of my life not understanding God. I believed in God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost.. I went to church frequently.. but I did not believe that God loved me.. I did not believe that I could have a good life. I thought I was on my own. Literally. God's "eternal blessings" were for other people, the "chosen people".  I heard the generic.. "read scriptures, pray, go to church.. then you'll be happy". . but I didn't believe it. In my life it was fend for myself, protect myself, work my butt off.. and then maybe.. just maybe you'll find a tiny happiness at the end. You see I didn't have any Faith in God.
    My mission has brought an immense sense of peace and understanding to my life. I've found myself on my knees begging God to help me understand, and He has shown me soo many wonderful things. I believe God had my mission in His  plan for me from the beggining. . my trials have really helped me to understand the people of Montana. My struggles have helped me love more.. reach deeper within myself.. asking God for the charity I need to forget myself.. and help these people. I don't know if there is anyone that I have helped more on this mission then myself. I've converted myself, to the gospel that was always available to me.. But God knew I needed my mission to do it.
    There's so much that goes into the work that the members do not see.  They expect that missionaries.. don't take a break to eat lunch.. shouldn't be playing soccer on P-day.. many many other things. It's been one of the rougher things I've dealt with out here. Sometimes you just have to please people. For any that know me.. you may know that I am NOT a people pleasure. I am not humble enough. haah seriously. So it's something I'm working on. When you come to a new area.. the previous missionaries may have been breaking rules.. the members do not really know the misison rules.. so they find these things to be "set in stone schedules" that all missionaries should do. It's hard to break the cycle but I came out here to do the Lord's work.. aha I'm reminded of Moroni 7
45 And acharity suffereth long, and is bkind, and cenvieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily dprovoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
   Sometimes it takes a while for the members to get used to the way you do things. But in the end.. if you have charity for the people.. everything works out and understanding prevails. . because Charity is the pure Love of Christ.
   I saw a miracle this Sunday. Sam and Tiffany came to church. Tiffany hasn't been to the church in YEARS. I sat next to her in relief society and we chatted and laughed about stuff that was going on. It must be rougghh coming back to church when EVERYONE in the ward knows your excommunicated. She is awesome though. Just love her.
     I am nowhere near perfect. . but because of this gospel.. I know how to be better.. how to be happy.. how to make good things happen in my life.. by letting God take the reins.
Love ya'll
Sister Davidson

Monday, April 9, 2012

Helena I ♥ you





Sister Valdiveiso, Danielle, Bry'yanna, Me



It's been an amazing week. I am LOVING.. I repeat that.. LOVING Helena.. I just love it. p.s. I love it. My companion and I are finding and teaching well together. We picked up an excommunicated couple who have been away for over 10 years.. The Smith family. Thier parents are in one of our wards and Sisters have not had much success before.. just a couple random visits with them. Well we met with them and it was RAD. We watched Finding Faith in Christ with the whole family.. (They have four kids that all attend church).. then we talked about the atonement of Jesus Christ.. how it's not just a one time deal.. It's unbelieveable to me how much love/charity I can feel for people I just met. But I do. I don't care AT ALL.. what they have done in the past. . I know the Atonement will heal them.. it will.. there is no "gone too far".
I'm so excited to see how this turns out.. pray for them!

     So Larry.. the man with MD that we have a baptisimal date for.. he is so awesome. We also went and watched finding Fath in Christ with him... he had a few questions.. He asked "So does this mean when I will get ressurrected and I will have my body back"?  It was the most tender thing ever. I seriously almost bawled as we told him.. yes Larry.. you will have a perfect body.. you won't have any pain.. you won't have to take any medicine. He smiled. He then asked, " but what if I sin again after I am baptized"?  We went on to teach about the Sacrament.. and the Plan of Happiness.. and how the ressurection is a gift to all men.. wiked or righteous..   Isn't that a miracle? How loving is our Heavenly Father to offer us such a gift through His Son Jesus Christ.
    
     I have had so many experiecnes on my mission. Miracles. Small and Large. There have been many times where I felt unworthy to be where I was.. to witness what I was seeing. Some things are too sacred to share. How grateful I am to have come here to Montana.. Who would have ever thought I would ever be a missionary? Now I can't imagine my life If I never came. I would not be me without this. I feel sooooo blessed. No matter how hard some days are.. the miracles outweigh any discouragement. I love the Lord.
Loves,
Sister Davidson


p.s. On a funny note.. my comp's name is Sister Valdieiso.. so everyone thinks she is Mexican.. what's funny is that I am more Mexican than her.. hhaa that's right she's full white.. She was adopted.. she gets so irrated when people think she is some other nationalitiy.. I find it hilarious.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Loving Helena

So I feel like I have greenie fire right now. Ha If that's too missionary lingo for you, it means I feel like I just got out on my mission and it feels great! So many awesome things have happened since I have been transferred to Helena..
My companion Sister Valdiviso is from Visalia.. I think she is in my cousin's stake! The Lakes.. Anyway I love her!  she is a bit crazy.. reminds me of me when I was younger.. not that I'm not still crazy:) haha but it's been GREAT working with her. She has the desire to serve and we work well together.. we have just been talking to EVERYONE we see!.. the best part is that with her we have the same spunk and so I don't feel awkward. Remember how in conference I can;t remember who told the story.. about the Senior companion that patted the Junior one on the back when the guy was rude to them at the door? Yeah I have been doing that to her everytime as a joke.. and for some reason we find it hilarious.
  I have really started to learn to listen to the spirit.. right then and there! Don't sit and worry if it's the spirit prompting you to do something good. if it's a good thing do it! So our first lesson together we went to teach this man Larry Benson. He has muscular distrophy.. really sweet guy that had a few WOW problems.. so we taught him about the word of Wisdom and he agreed he would do it.. so my companion is still teaching and talking and I feel the spirit saying "ask the man if he wants to get baptized".. I'm thinking.. I have no idea how long they have been teaching him, my comp had said he wasn't really progressing. . so I wasn't sure if they had already asked him or anything.. So I kept debating with the spirit for a few minutes.. then I blurted "So Larry have any of the Sister's ever asked you if you want to be baptized"? (sad attempt right haha) and he said actually no they haven't asked me yet.. then Sister Validiviso asked him if he would like to be baptized April 28 and he said YES!!!! We walked out of that house beaming.. the Spirit was sooo strong. I felt good knowing that I actually listened.. Sister V was freaking out.. she's like OH MY GOSH THAT WAS SO AMAZING, I HAVEN"T FELT SO GUIDED BEFORE! It was awesome.. she said she felt like she wanted to ask him before, but her companion never felt like they should.. so it was just perfect timing!

       Ok so then two days later we had 2 baptisms!!! Yeah the ward members here are sweet. This lady abby started bringing her friend Danielle and her daughter to church.. the sisters started teaching them and they both got baptized after the last confrence session on Saturday! I only got to teach them once on Friday before they were baptized, but it was awesome being a part of it. Danielle is obsessed with hello kitty.. which I also am haha and she gave me a cute wallet and Calendar. It was cute.

   There's always some adjusting when you are working with a new missionary.. but it's exciting.. and I loved conference! I loved every talk. One I especailly loved was Uchdorf's just STOP IT! It was so good. I love the gospel.. I can't wait to see more miracles unfold!
Loves
Sister Davidson